Saturday, we had a great youth kick-off at Wes and Justine Holland's farm. As I was loading up to go home, something struck me. In between the tiredness, the smug satisfaction that I had not been hit in paintball, and the mellow feeling of fellowship we had had around the campfire, I realized that I no longer feel lonely. In fact, I could not remember the last time I felt lonely. And the funny thing is, the thing I am struggling to explain, is that it has nothing to do with people. It has to do with Jesus. I realized that when I gave my life to Him in faith, a long loneliness ended. How many hours, days, weeks, years even, had I spent being with people in the same place at the same time? And yet still the feeling, the sure sense, that that is all it was, could ever be-- being in the same place at the same time. And yet when I knew Christ, that ended, without my really perceiving that it had ended. I am not sure I really recognized it until Saturday night.
Perhaps even more amazing as I think about it, after I came to Christ, I passed through some bitter times, times that when I look back on myself, I was definitely ALONE. As in sometimes, there literally were no people around. Forget having anyone to count on... there was NOBODY around. And yet I had a constant sense of the presence of God.
I wonder if we could add to our desire for evangelism the knowledge that God will take care of everything. The hidden struggles of the people we share faith with... even those things will be unraveled and smoothed out, turned to glory, even.
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